I attended Back To School night at my daughters’ school last week. While I wish I could say I was enthralled by the teachers’ presentations, the truth is I was too preoccupied by a pervasive sense of self-consciousness to fully focus.
Let’s back up. I’m the first to admit I’m no fashion icon, and I don’t do well in situations with ambiguous dress codes. I spent the hour before the event throwing all my clothes on my bed, trying on every different combination imaginable, and hating everything on my body. I ended up putting on some mismatched combination in the 11th hour; my husband and I slinked into the packed cafeteria 15 minutes late. So much stress, and all because this 40 year old still can’t dress herself.
For me, fashion has long been a foreign language that I can’t decipher. I view my fashionable peers with envy: They’re on trend! They’re put effortlessly together! And yet I have big feelings about the fashion industry. I’m all too aware of the sustainability issues surrounding fashion, and I know because I’ve reported on it that when we donate clothes they likely aren’t going to a “needy person”. (Spoiler alert: There is far more discarded clothing in the US than there are needy people!).
I’m under no illusions that decluttering my closet means I’m “helping” the less fortunate, and I have a bone-deep understanding that my unwanted clothes are likely headed to the landfill. (Even worse, perhaps they will travel across the Atlantic and reach their final resting place atop the clothing mountain in Ghana.) So no, I’m not interested in “keeping up with trends” if keeping up with trends means hopping on a perpetual cycle of buying what’s in style and promptly “donating” it soon after.
I don’t want or need to be a fashion icon and I want no part of wonton wastefulness in the name of fashion. But it would certainly be nice to at the very least blend in.
This week on the podcast we discussed expert-backed ways to refresh our wardrobes without being wasteful:
All Killer, No Filler
80% of the time we wear just 20% of our wardrobes, so the problem is not that we need more clothes.
While the never-ending trend cycle has trained us to add, add, add to our closets, home organizing expert Shira Gill suggests instead that we do the opposite. It’s not about adding additional filler; it’s about subtracting so we are left only with what’s killer.
Declutter your closet before making any decisions. A pared-down wardrobe means you know what you have and what you need. It also means that you can dress yourself without the mental fatigue associated with sifting through the junk to get to what looks good, feels good, and flatters.
You may be wondering how to best discern what’s considered ‘killer’ from the piles of ‘filler’. Designer Tory Burch suggests keeping well-fitting base layers in neutral colors. Tees and long-sleeve shirts that are well made with natural fibers are considered ‘killer’. Jeans that flatter, regardless of cut (see next tip), too. And don’t forget the classics: A well-fitting blazer. A timeless accessory with a pop of color.
Decluttering your closet is also a great time to assess your own attitudes with regard to not only your clothes, but clothing in general. These days, Americans treat clothes like they would any other single-use disposable item. Are you one of them? (If you aren’t sure, ask yourself: Have you ever bought a garment you knew you’d only wear once?)
Don’t put garments that you like and that flatter in the donation box simply because they are out of style (I’m looking at you, skinny jeans and ballet flats!). Which leads me to mindful refresh idea #2:
Adapt, don’t abandon
If you ever feel like your wardrobe is stuck in the past, New York Times fashion critic Vanessa Friedman argues this is a totally normal feeling that’s often brought on by the fact that our “style” is formed by the ethos of the time in which we started buying our own clothes with our own money. According to Vanessa,
“… there is a middle ground between chasing the next young hot thing and retreating to the frumpy thing. It’s about remembering that what’s trendy today is passé tomorrow.”
Instead of getting rid of your skinny jeans (that will be back on trend in a hot minute by the way), pair those skinny jeans with a boxy blazer and bring them into 2024 with the help of a timeless and always on-trend item. Adapt, don’t abandon.
Can I also say to my fellow aging Millennials … how about we accept who and what we are instead of perpetually trying to look younger? Chasing what’s new and trendy in the fashion realm won’t turn back the hands of time, and that’s because our faces are giving us away regardless of how many crop tops we invest in or how many loose-fitting pants we usher into our closets. So how about we do something radically countercultural in its own right and embrace our age? It’s a privilege to get older, and it’s not guaranteed.
Three adjectives, please
I’ll be honest: when I first read about this strategy I visibly rolled my eyes. But if, like me, you find yourself overwhelmed by too many choices, there’s value here.
Instead of blindly following trends, take celebrity stylist Allison Bornstein’s advice and select 3 adjectives to identify your unique style. Perhaps your words are chic. Professional. Elevated.
I spent time nailing down my words, and I couldn’t choose just 3. I ended up with 4:
👗 Minimal, because I believe that less is more in fashion, in home decor, in my schedule, and in life. I’m not a woman who’s going to wear 13 bracelets and accessorize every inch of my body. I’m just not her.
👗 Effortless, because I want to be put together but I don’t want getting dressed to take a lot of time, mental energy, or money.
👗 Comfortable, because if a garment is uncomfortable I just won’t wear it. When my clothes are uncomfortable, I’m off my game. I’m worrying about my outfit instead of being present. No thank you.
👗 Flattering, because I believe that what’s flattering should transcend trends.
I love having a shorthand to anchor my shopping and outfit decisions. Get picking your words, and leave them for the rest of us in the comments below!
Raise the dead
Small tweaks to our clothes via mending and tailoring can make a huge difference; they can also allow us to keep wearing our items for a lot longer.
I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking — and perhaps rightfully so — that it’s easier and cheaper to just trash what you’ve got and buy something on trend. But stay with me, because a mending mindset empowers you to elevate what you already own:
Frayed jeans are all the rage, and you can fray a pair of old jeans yourself. Zero skill required!
Got crop tops? Take an old shirt and crop it yourself!
Bring your favorite blazer into 2024 with the help of your local tailor. Ask for “bracelet length sleeves” and while you’re at it don’t underestimate the value of a good tailor to bring select items back from the dead.
If you aren’t confident with your mending skills yet, consider putting in the time to learn. In our disposable world, mending is a small act of resistance. It’s also a way to reclaim a bit of your power that has been lost to industrialization. And if you haven’t ever had anything tailored, remember that good fit is EVERYthing. Sometimes all our closets need are the keen eye of a professional.
There’s a new podcast episode out now with more tips and tricks for a mindful (keyword mindful!) wardrobe refresh. You can listen for free via your favorite podcast player, and subscribers get extra ideas straight from the experts!
PS! Sustainable Minimalists has moved over to a listener-supported model. If you’ve been with me for some (or all!) of the podcast’s 498 episodes and you’d like to show your support, please consider supporting this work for $5 a month or just $50 a year.
Your minimalist friend,
Stephanie
PTA meetings, jeans, loafers, color button down shirt, cardigan if ac is on or you’re always cold. Bracelet, pretty necklace, or chain, or earrings. Done!